Good-bye, wonderful woman. Thank you for the strength of your red.

STOP POKING THE BEAR, GOOFUS!!!

The meat of the issue, the very heart of the cow is that I am overcoming/have overcome a lot of issues. And I do mean ISSUES. But just because I have learned to put said brain glitches in their place doesn't mean that they don't pop full force out of their cage every now and again. 'Cause a cage still allows for the sound to escape. You can still see the little frights. They may be contained and unable to inflict as much damage as they used to, but it's not smart to let my soul 'round the cage that often. My soul has a tendency to poke the bear, even when occasionally it is unable to deal with the consequences.

"Oww! That HURT! But he seemed like such a nice bear. Nevermind he just bit the crap outta my arm, I should reach right through these bars and try to pet him again. Uh-oh! There went a finger! Poor guy. He's just misunderstood. I'd be mad if I was in a cage too. See! I understand you! So you should let me pet you, even though your low-rumbling growl indicates to me that you don't want me to. But you don't really know what you want, do you, you adorable little confused thing...well really, who needs both hands, anyway?"

My ability to see the bad and rationalize it away, forget it, overlook it...WHAT-ever, makes me prone to think that, even when I get treated like crap, there is always a REASON, dammit, and I should be understanding. So I focus on the good, and pine for the good, and never once realize that there also was not so very good. I can't let go because I can't see all of the wounds. Or for some reason, if I do see them, the wounds are not dire, and therefore I should be strong enough to deal with them.

Strong, STRONG, STRONG...you should be strong.

It's becoming increasingly apparent that I am strong and tolerant for all of the wrong things. Yeah, we're quite stinkin' surprised about that.